Previously on John Milito's Amazing Scams, I had just scammed Delta Air Suckers out of $1200 in Target gift cards and was now not-so-patiently waiting for them to arrive.
I realized that if Lydia just let me have her share of the loot that I could possibly buy an Hermes brand Apple Watch. She selfishly declined.
My gift cards finally arrived!
Time to drive immediately to Target and spend these babies.
I decided that I needed an Apple Watch instead of groceries or some other more responsible purchase. Hey this was going to help me track my health stats, and isn't an investment in one's health priceless?
Lydia wanted a Fitbit or something but was clearly becoming more and more jelly as time progressed.
Lydia got so overcome with jelliness on the way home from Target that I had to drive her to a different Target to get her a watch as well.
Artist's depiction of Lydia.
We also bought a Roomba vacuum servant with the remainder of our winnings. Two fancy watches and a robot helper for free was not a bad haul at all.
Excitement!
Now I'll never have to wonder if I'm having a heart murmur!
I'll always know what time sunset is! All of my problems are hereby solved. The end.
No comments:
Post a Comment