Friday, August 11, 2023

The Empire Strips Back

Ernie is very cute when he's milk drunk.

Aunt Zoe babysat for us while we hit the big city.

Sometimes parking in a city requires reading a short story of seemingly conflicting rules.

We arrived at the Cornish Playhouse for the show.

This Father's Day I told Ernie, "look you're two months old and it's ok if you want to phone it in this year with a tie or some golf tees. It's chill bro." And I'll never forget it, he looks up at me, tears in his eyes, and says his first three words: "Star. Wars. Burlesque." Sure enough I found two tickets under my pillow that night.

We had our trip to the Galactic Starcruiser coming up and Lydia is incapable of staying awake during a movie so this was my only chance to get her some Star Wars background knowledge before we go so that she doesn't embarrass me with her constant "is this a Wookie or an Ewok?" questions.

I was especially excited about the giant inflatable Jabba the Hutt they rolled out on stage.

I was impressed with the themed refreshment options.

This was a Rice Chewie. Extra credit for thinking of that pun.


The merch table was very amusing as well.

I was tempted to buy one of these Japanese tshirts.

I was also tempted to buy one of these 70s style parody nudie mags but they were like $50 each!

The show was surprisingly good. It was sexy and very funny as well, which I was impressed that they were able to pull off. They were also really speaking the language of the Star Wars nerds while appealing to normal people as well. The thing was a damn masterpiece if I'm being honest. At one point a lady dancer was wearing a nude suit thing to look like a naked Emperor Palpatine, with all sorts of unfortunate body parts hanging all over the place. He then straddled a disco ball version of the Death Star and it began swinging around the stage while he performed a rendition of "Wrecking Ball" by Miley Cyrus. It changed my life.

We were checking our baby monitor thing periodically, as much to watch Ernie as make sure Zoe was behaving herself as well.

We had some Dick's in memory of Emperor Palpatine before heading back home.

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