Saturday, June 12, 2021

Meramec River Styles

Emma and Tyler and their dog Finn were new participants in our river floating. It was fun to have new people around to mix things up a bit. They were very intense about camp cooking. I wonder if they haven’t been camping a ton and so wanted to do “real” camping and the rest of us realize that float camping is more about sleeping off a hangover while inside a tent than any sort of communal experience with nature.

One unfortunate part about this trip is we didn’t go with the rafts like we usually do, we did kayaks. It's rumored that this fateful mistake was the brainchild of a certain Lydia Chlamydia. Well with a kayak you are forced to lay your legs out in the sun to be roasted like a delicious chickens. Well despite reapplying my sun goop more than once, I got the worst sunburn of my life. I never knew, or really needed to consider, that when you get sunburn your skin doesn’t turn red because it was burned so much as blood is moving to the area in order to repair the damage done to it by the menacing nuclear reactor in the sky. Well, if you get a really bad sunburn then a really too large amount of blood flows to the scene of the crime and… you get swelling. Over the next few days my legs and especially my ankles got so swollen that it was painful for me to walk.

The river is where cool kids wearing Walmart's hottest styles go to be seen.

Every year running somebody tries to mess with my freedoms so I have no choice but to wear this shirt.

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