Frozen

We checked out Tower Grove Park and it was wintery as heck.

I'm not a plumber but I wouldn't think this would be good for the pipes. Maybe if you keep the water moving they don't explode?

I got a coffee body scrub from my product sample scam so I... sampled it.

Finally they found a good use for coffee.

Diet Accomplished

I bet Hank that I could lose 40 pounds in four months. It ended up being a challenge that was well suited to my current situation of zero bars or restaurants or really interacting with other people in person at all. It was much easier to control my diet under these circumstances. I also rode the crap out of the Peloton.

Viry and Lolo gave me a pizza for my birthday like 3 months ago and it has been glumly waiting for me in the fridge ever since. I set it free!

We already had several ice cream toppings on hand from.. coupon sort of maneuvers that I like to do to get random free stuff. Anyway it turned into a nice celebratory ice cream bar.

I need to get fat again ASAP because none of my clothes fit and it's super annoying and I don't want to have to buy a whole new wardrobe. At one point we took a walk in Tower Grove Park and I didn't have a belt on for some reason. I had to walk around the whole time with my thumbs in my belt loops to keep my pants from falling down.

I've been scheming on how to get into a covid vaccine trial to potentially get my shot before everyone else and be the coolest kid in town. A downside that has been on my mind is that if you are in the placebo group that they may not tell you for a while, and then if the vaccine became available you would potentially then not get it because you wouldn't know if you already had it or not. I'm feeling brave though, because getting the coronavirus sounds unpleasant and I'm tired of living like I'm on a space station.

Hillbillies seem determined to pretend that this isn't a problem. They aren't really that good about threats that require a lot of thought.

Better late than never I guess?

Part of the reason that I'm a hero is that instead of going outside and coughing on people I'm staying home and watching 1990s episodes of Supermarket Sweep. It's interesting to see which brands survived and which didn't.

All the time I've saved by going nowhere and doing nothing I have invested in numerous bubble baths.

An Adult Easter Egg Hunt

When I heard there was going to be an Easter egg hunt for adults in Tower Grove Park I was immediately on board. I went to one or two public Easter egg hunts in public parks as a child and got clobbered by giant man-children who were probably competing out of their age group and/or on performance enhancing drugs. Now though I am a full grown wolfman with a hunger. A hunger that can only be satisfied by snatching plastic eggs away from the weak. Let the games begin!

The event was a Planned Parenthood fundraiser so I felt like that was moral cover to destroy my opponents.

We scoped out the prize table while we waited for game time. Some of the eggs contained pieces of paper that could be redeemed for prizes. I like prizes.

When they blew the starting whistle I turned on the jets and started vacuuming up the treasure-filled containers. We were in a group of 5 or 6 and when I was finished berserking I didn't know where a single one of them was. There was one in the middle of a creek and I figured that such an annoyingly placed egg might have a good prize so I used a stick to fish it out.

We knew the number of eggs and the number of contestants and each person should have found 10 on average. I found 30. I had to sit down for like 30 minutes to catch my breath but it was worth it.

We didn't win any of the big prizes like Cardinals tickets but we got a few amusing little things. The best prize of all is knowing I helped send a couple of suckers home with only the taste of grass to chew on.

To the victor go the cupcake flavored unicorn cereals!

Kickball Fall 2016

By popular demand we played not only the spring season but now also the fall season of Big Balls kickball at Tower Grove Park. We are pretty terrible so I am torn between our jolly comraderie and the sting of getting stomped all the time. Sigh. Today was especially fun because the Festival of Nations was taking place at the same park on the same weekend as our game. We had an hour gap between matches so a bunch of us walked over to where the action was and grabbed some grub before heading back for the next match. It was fun.

Brandon's parents had a little concert at their house so we stopped by after kickball to listen to the Bottle Rockets bang out a few tunes.