Cap Haitien, Haiti. So Garbagey

We snoozed at the Miami Admiral's Club until our flight to Haiti. This lounge's claim to fame was that they had showers. It was much bigger but also had a lot of weirdos in it so it was a wash.

We finally got to enjoy the business class service this flight. I opened with a dish of warmed mixed nuts and a large pour of Woodford Reserve bourbon. We visited the distillery on our tour of Kentucky's bourbon trail. Sometimes I whisper "hello my old friend" to the bourbon before I drink it. But that's neither here nor there.

I didn't even want any salt or pepper but I opened the package anyway. How decadent.

I always thought that they didn't give you metal silverware on a plane because it's a security risk. Turns out they're just cheap.

I watched Leonardo choke his enemies in The Revenant while I choked down more expensive alcohol. We're both heroes.

Haiti looks nice when you're really high up but it's all downhill from there.

We had agreed upon a hotel car pickup upon arrival but shockingly there wasn't one so we said yes to one of the pestering taxi men and hit the road. A nice and confusing surprise when we exited the airport was the several Norwegian police outside guarding the place.

The scene that unfolded reminded me of Africa a whole lot. Garbage was everywhere. Lydia wondered why there were no beachfront hotels in town until she saw the beach. The "beach" in Haiti is pretty much where the dry garbage meets the wet garbage.

The worst part of the city looked like someone was trying to colonize a landfill. The people seemed impressively clean in contrast to their surroundings with their clothing and the nearby buildings full of bright colors.

The Hotel du Roi Cristophe was fine by our standards but pretty much heaven by theirs. After our long journey we were content to spend the rest of the day inside the hotel's walls.

Until I started traveling I had no idea how luxurious flushing one's toilet paper really is. Nothing says "cleanliness" like having a basket full of poopy toilet paper in your bathroom.

Dinner at the hotel's restaurant was solid. Lydia had "Haitien specialty of conch" and I had "goat with creole sauce". Both were excellent.

I got rice and fried plantains as my sides. I think the mushy stuff bottom left is mashed okra. It wasn't bad.

And that was that. I wasn't about to go out in Garbageland at night. No way. We did some reading and kept it real until bed time.